Kalik Lager
Brewed By: Commonwealth Brewery
Brewed In: Nassau, Bahamas
ABV: ?
What They Say: Nothing. It’s apparently brewed by Heineken International, but I can’t find any info on it.
Website: Oddly, none. Kalik.com is owned by CSC but it isn’t even set to redirect to anything. It didn’t surprise me so much about Sands as it was a new start-up brewery. If this is actually being brewed by Heineken, a public company, I’m shocked they wouldn’t do something with the domain name… especially as it seems to be a beer label that would be plastered all over Spring Break.
Why I Picked It: It was one of three beers in my wet bar at Atlantis. My choices were Heineken, Miller Lite, and this.
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Presentation (5): Very similar bottle and label design to the afore-reviewed Sands Lager. My original notes say the labels were similar enough that I wouldn’t be shocked to discover these two beers came from the same company. I’d find out later that this wasn’t the case. 2
Originality (5): It is pretty much exactly the same as any other Caribbean lager I’ve ever had. There is nothing here that’s setting the beer industry on its ear. 1
Taste (10): This had that kind of tinny taste usually indicative of German beers. In my notes, I said it tastes like a weak Heineken. This makes a whole lot of sense after discovering it’s brewed at Heineken’s Commonwealth Brewery. If you were take that distinctly Heineken flavor and cut it in half you’d get Heineken Lite. In half again would be Kalik. 3
Body (10): Very watery and smooth. You barely register that you’re drinking a beer before it’s swallowed and gone. If this is the standard version, I can’t even imagine the Lite (which does exist). 4
Efficiency (10): Again, as this seems like the Bahamas version of a Coors Light, we’ll call the ABV 5.0% and go from there. Remember the rule — low ABV is just fine if you can pound with no hesitation. That said, 5.0% is a bit low for full marks. This could be raised at a later date if I find out the ABV is higher. 7
Versatility (10): There’s a light version of this beer and I’d guess that to be the Coors Light of the Bahamas. You know — that beer that sponsors Spring Break and has its label plastered over anything where young folk might be. Smooth going down and no distinct flavor to distract you from just drinking. And they say only the US makes mass-produced, crap beer. There’s nothing you couldn’t use this beer for. 10
Final Grade: 27 (of 50) – OK beer.
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